Pokud spolu \u017eijeme del\u0161\u00ed dobu, mohou se za\u010d\u00edt v na\u0161em p\u00e1rov\u00e9m nebo rodinn\u00e9m sou\u017eit\u00ed znovu a znovu objevovat chv\u00edle, kter\u00e9 n\u00e1s rozla\u010fuj\u00ed, vzdaluj\u00ed n\u00e1s od sebe a ztrp\u010duj\u00ed n\u00e1m \u017eivot. Jako bychom se dokola ocitali v podobn\u00e9 nep\u0159\u00edjemn\u00e9 situaci, ve kter\u00e9 se spolu s partnerem nebo jin\u00fdm \u010dlenem rodiny nec\u00edt\u00edme v\u016fbec dob\u0159e. Poh\u00e1d\u00e1me se znovu a znovu kv\u016fli podobn\u00e9 v\u011bci, jako by to bylo za\u010darovan\u00e9, jsme zoufal\u00ed.<\/p>\n
Takov\u00e9 situace v\u0161ak vytv\u00e1\u0159\u00edme t\u00edm, jak na sebe reagujeme. Je to oboustrann\u00e1 souhra partner\u016f, hra, kter\u00e1 se znovu a znovu opakuje. Jde vlastn\u011b o takov\u00fd vztahov\u00fd vzorec vz\u00e1jemn\u011b prov\u00e1zan\u00fdch reakc\u00ed partner\u016f, kter\u00e9 udr\u017euj\u00ed stav, kter\u00fd nic dobr\u00e9ho nep\u0159in\u00e1\u0161\u00ed a jen o\u017eivuje nespokojenost obou partner\u016f. Jeden je t\u0159eba k druh\u00e9mu kritick\u00fd a ten se uraz\u00ed a st\u00e1hne. M\u016f\u017eeme m\u00edt a\u017e dojem, \u017ee n\u011bco mus\u00edme d\u011blat, kdy\u017e n\u00e1m partner d\u011bl\u00e1 to a to – vysta\u010dit si bez druh\u00e9ho, vzd\u00e1lit se od partnera, \u00fapln\u011b se mu pod\u0159\u00eddit atd. T\u011bmito reakcemi se pak partne\u0159i zra\u0148uj\u00ed ve sv\u00fdch nejcitliv\u011bj\u0161\u00edch m\u00edstech, ale m\u016f\u017ee jim p\u0159ipadat, \u017ee nemaj\u00ed jinou mo\u017enost, ne\u017e d\u011blat, co d\u011blaj\u00ed. Chov\u00e1n\u00ed partnera v n\u00e1s spou\u0161t\u00ed automatick\u00e9 obrann\u00e9 reakce. Jedn\u00e1n\u00ed jednoho posiluje reakci druh\u00e9ho.<\/p>\n
\u010casto na sebe nasedaj\u00ed ur\u010dit\u00e1 zv\u00fdrazn\u011bn\u00e1 t\u00e9mata obou partner\u016f, v\u011bt\u0161inou je to n\u011bco, na co se stali citliv\u00ed ji\u017e v minulosti je\u0161t\u011b d\u00e1vno p\u0159ed t\u00edm, ne\u017e se poznali. Stali se n\u011b\u010d\u00edm snadno zraniteln\u00ed, kv\u016fli tomu co za\u017e\u00edvali ve sv\u00fdch p\u016fvodn\u00edch rodin\u00e1ch nebo v jin\u00fdch p\u0159edchoz\u00edch vztaz\u00edch. M\u016f\u017ee to vypl\u00fdvat z na\u0161ich pot\u0159eb, kter\u00e9 nebyly napln\u011bny v d\u011btstv\u00ed. Po t\u011bch zku\u0161enostech jsme se n\u011b\u010demu cht\u011bli vyhnout, p\u0159ed n\u011b\u010d\u00edm ochr\u00e1nit, abychom to ji\u017e znovu neza\u017e\u00edvali a najednou se pr\u00e1v\u011b to objev\u00ed jako stra\u0161idlo p\u0159\u00edmo v na\u0161em p\u00e1rov\u00e9m vztahu.<\/p>\n
P\u0159\u00edkladem m\u016f\u017ee b\u00fdt t\u0159eba zv\u00fd\u0161en\u00e1 citlivost mu\u017ee na zasahov\u00e1n\u00ed druh\u00fdch do jeho \u017eivota a t\u00edm p\u00e1dem zv\u00fd\u0161en\u00e1 pot\u0159eba samostatnosti. Na stran\u011b \u017eeny zas m\u016f\u017ee j\u00edt o zv\u00fd\u0161enou citlivost na sch\u00e1zen\u00ed podpory a zv\u00fd\u0161en\u00e1 pot\u0159eba bl\u00edzkosti druh\u00e9ho, kdy d\u00e1v\u00e1 p\u0159ednost d\u011blat v\u011bci spole\u010dn\u011b. M\u016f\u017ee pak doj\u00edt k tomu, \u017ee \u017eena m\u016f\u017ee na to, kdy\u017e chce partner d\u011blat n\u011bco samostatn\u011b, reagovat negativn\u011b, proto\u017ee si p\u0159eje p\u0159it\u00e1hnout partnera k sob\u011b. T\u00edm ov\u0161em dojde k opaku, partner m\u00e1 tendenci se st\u00e1hnout a zv\u00fdraznit svou samostatnost. A je tu za\u010darovan\u00fd kruh vz\u00e1jemn\u00e9ho zra\u0148ov\u00e1n\u00ed. T\u00e9matem tohoto p\u00e1ru je dilema, nakolik m\u00e1m \u017e\u00edt pro druh\u00e9ho a nakolik mohu z\u016fstat s\u00e1m sebou. Jin\u00fdm t\u00e9matem m\u016f\u017ee b\u00fdt t\u0159eba m\u00edra vz\u00e1jemn\u00e9 p\u00e9\u010de, m\u00edra \u0159\u00edzen\u00ed druh\u00e9ho atd.<\/p>\n
Jak se dostat ze za\u010darovan\u00e9ho kruhu? Pot\u0159ebujeme zjistit, \u010d\u00edm se vz\u00e1jemn\u011b zra\u0148ujeme a dr\u00e1\u017ed\u00edme. M\u016f\u017eeme se pokusit vypozorovat, co se n\u00e1m st\u00e1le opakuje, v jak\u00fdch situac\u00edch se s partnerem ocit\u00e1me znovu a znovu. Co obvykle d\u011bl\u00e1m, kdy\u017e m\u016fj partner d\u011bl\u00e1 toto? Kdy\u017e si takov\u00fd vztahov\u00fd vzorec uv\u011bdom\u00edme, m\u016f\u017eeme p\u0159em\u00fd\u0161let o tom, co by se stalo, kdybychom se nechr\u00e1nili obvyklou reakc\u00ed a zachovali se jinak. T\u00edm si m\u016f\u017eeme z\u00edskat nadhled a m\u016f\u017eeme zkou\u0161et d\u011blat n\u011bco jin\u00e9ho, ne\u017e obvykle. Zjist\u00edme, \u017ee m\u016f\u017eeme reagovat jinak a z\u00edskat tak v\u00edce to, co oba v p\u00e1ru pot\u0159ebujeme. Proto\u017ee v\u0161ak rozpozn\u00e1n\u00ed p\u00e1rov\u00e9ho vzorce, kter\u00fd rozt\u00e1\u010d\u00ed za\u010darovan\u00fd kruh nemus\u00ed b\u00fdt snadn\u00e9, m\u016f\u017eete vyu\u017e\u00edt pomoci p\u00e1rov\u00e9ho psychoterapeuta.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Pokud spolu \u017eijeme del\u0161\u00ed dobu, mohou se za\u010d\u00edt v na\u0161em p\u00e1rov\u00e9m nebo rodinn\u00e9m sou\u017eit\u00ed znovu a znovu objevovat chv\u00edle, kter\u00e9 n\u00e1s rozla\u010fuj\u00ed, vzdaluj\u00ed n\u00e1s od sebe a ztrp\u010duj\u00ed n\u00e1m \u017eivot. Jako bychom se dokola ocitali v podobn\u00e9 nep\u0159\u00edjemn\u00e9 situaci, ve kter\u00e9 se spolu s partnerem nebo jin\u00fdm \u010dlenem rodiny nec\u00edt\u00edme v\u016fbec dob\u0159e. Poh\u00e1d\u00e1me se znovu […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":314,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/308"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=308"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/308\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":309,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/308\/revisions\/309"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/314"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=308"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=308"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/localhost\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=308"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}